Tag: success

Echo XXV

I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do.
– Edward Everett Hale

I started a new job, moved across the country, and left most everything I know to start fresh. Been on hiatus for a while, time to recollect. Let’s try again.

While digging through a stash of old corporate wellness materials, I stumbled upon a book written by Nancy Jane Smith called, “The Happier Approach.” It honestly reminds me of one of those free books you’d get at church during the Easter season, or from a self-help seminar, or in one of those little lending library kiosks you see in small towns. The cover art is very basic, and said cover art looks like it was printed in 480p. Yet, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed working my way through it (insert lesson on not judging a book by it’s cover).

One idea that Nancy works through has stuck with me – the idea that accomplishing a goal will provide a sensation of calm and quiet, that we should be overwhelmed with relief that we accomplished something. Yet, rarely is this the case. That focus moves from the task at hand, flies past the joys of completing it, and transfers into the anxiety and stress of what is next.

Her justification for this is that we are validating internal needs with external stimuli. Meaning, the internal feeling of anxiety or stress or fatigue or exhaustion isn’t magically fixed by an external factor. Its the same idea behind “I need a drink!” after a stressful day. It’s a band-aid in lieu of stitches.

We are on this constant quest for perfection. 10 things on the to-do list? If we do 9 but miss the 10th, we feel more guilt about missing it than pride in accomplishing the other 90%. We fear the ridicule from our brain for missing the one shot more than we long for the joy of bullseye’ing the others. The quest for protection protects us from the fear of failure, but it also blinds us of the little victories.

What if we don’t realize the life’s first 9 until we miss the 10th? Think of all the little victories you’ve let slide by because you missed that last task. Entire house is clean but the dishes are still soaking – failure. All of the bills, but you forgot the light bulbs you needed on your shopping trip – fail. The kiddos had perfect attendance at soccer this week, but you were 15 minutes late to that birthday party – fail.

Don’t let the idea of constantly moving the finish line further and further away cloud your view of the miles you’ve already run. Take a step back and see how far you’ve come. See the successes in simply living, breathing, being.

Echo XI

“What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals.”
– Zig Ziglar

I want to be rich.

I want to own a beautiful house.

I want to drive a Ferrari.

I want to travel the world.

These things are goals, albeit common yet extreme goals. Everyone wants to be successful and have lots of money and lounge around all day while your stocks and bonds pay your bills. Yet, what do we get from it? Are we looking to achieve these goals for the shallow reason of simply being successful? Or are we looking to reach these goals to become a better person, a more helpful person, a better role model for others?

In 2018, Jeff Bezos gave over 2 billion dollars do charity.

Bill and Melinda Gates gave 4.2 billion.

These are two of the most successful humans to ever walk the Earth (if we classify success based on wealth and global impact), yet they found the time to spread their success to others. They became their goals by achieving their goals.

I don’t mean to say that you need to be rich to make change, to grow. If your goal is to lose 20 pounds by Summer, make that goal more specific to include the fact that a lower body-weight will not only make you feel more confident, but allow you an easier time playing with your kids. If your goal is to alleviate credit card debt over the next 2 years, realize that this frees up funds to continue your education, take your family on vacation, or send your kiddo to Summer Camp. Your goal could be as simple as not being late to work again, knowing this not only lessens your risk of unemployment but makes you a better employee.

Don’t strive for success simply for the sake of being successful; strive for success to be a better.

Echo IX

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
– Winston Churchill

Failure has become the most taboo piece of human nature. We fear failure, we laugh at those who have failed, we spend time ignoring the failures to pursue the success. Failure has become less empowering than success, and that is an issue. Sure, success is the ultimate goal – we long for it in every move we make. The money, the cars, the stability. Yet, we ignore the process required to find success.

Abraham Lincoln lost in 26 separate campaigns before he was elected to public office.

Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team.

Steven Spielberg was rejected from USC’s School of Theatre, Film, and Television 3 separate times.

Yet, do we know these people for their failures? No, we know them for their successes – their changing of the world as we know. The Emancipation Proclamation, the free-throw line dunk, “E.T. phone home.” We don’t see these people and think of their failures, we see them and envision our own success and happiness. Yet, they’d be the first to tell you that what they have and what they’ve made weren’t by luck or skill. They were made through passion, hard-work, and countless failures.

We need to get back to a place where failure empowers us more than the thought of success. Our failures should teach us, motivate us, and drive us to success. They should be the stepping stones to the top, the ripples leading to a wave. Failure should be an exciting learning experience; failure shouldn’t be feared or ridiculed, it should be respected.

Folks don’t race Pike’s Peak for the ease and simplicity, they race it for the turns, corners, and grit. We should treat life the same, embracing the tight curves, the hard bumps, the gravel, knowing it is taking us to the top.

Echo VII

“We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing must be attained.”
– Marie Curie

Born in 1867, Marie Curie thrived in a so-called “man’s world” and accomplished many things. For one, she was a two-time Nobel laureate in two different scientific disciplines (Physics & Chemistry). She was raised poor, but with core values invested in education and self-improvement.

This is a quote that speaks on dedication, and those who lack dedication are generally those living in dissatisfaction. People dissatisfied with their jobs, income, social-status, or self-proclaimed definition of “success”. If only they had dedication – instead of being upset with their situation, they’d rather be motivated to change it.

We have all lacked dedication at one point in our lives.

We tend to drift away from painful things, and instead gravitate to whatever gains us pleasure, but to what end? Dedication comes from having a purpose, which then gives our lives both meaning and direction. Gravitating to whatever fix you need is just wandering, and those without direction simply wander.

Now having confidence in yourself, that’s comes with a different context – or does it? I view confidence as something that fuels your dedication, and any advances you make toward the thing you are dedicated to, will fuel your confidence. It’s a cycle.

If you find you are struggling with confidence, dedication, self-improvement, or navigating through the mundane, I suggest you start creating tasks for yourself.

During my times of greatest depression, I found that just making my bed in the morning helped me feel as though I had accomplished a task.. i.e. making advancements => fueling confidence => fueling dedication.

So what are you gifted for? What is your higher purpose, and will you start building the dedication to attain it?

Alissa Geisse is a Ph.D. Student at THE Ohio State University, in the Dept. of Evolution, Ecology, and Organismal Biology. She is a patent holding, Graduate degree obtaining, inspirational badass who I’m very thankful for.

Echo VI

“The thing about self-discipline is that it is necessary for everything you do in your life. You have to be self-disciplined.”
– Terry Crews

The simplest ingredient to success is self-discipline. It is your responsibility to make the best decisions, to strive for the greatest outcome, to find the purest form of self. Without your own sense of self-discipline you will struggle to find the path that you seek. You will fail early, and you will fail often. I consider failure a win if it leads to growth, but without self-discipline failure is simply failure.

We often favor comfortable hells over favorable heavens.

We find comfort in the normal. We, as a human race, have decided that the easiest way from point A to point B is a straight line. I’m not speaking in a mathematical or physics based way, I’m speaking in a self-motivation and hard-work way. We would rather be good enough than great. It is easier to dwell in a comfortable hell than to try and find a favorable heaven. We accept the drowning nature of stagnancy rather than striving to swim to the surface and pull ourselves from the sea. This could be anything from accepting the fact we aren’t happy in a relationship due to the fear of being alone, accepting heart disease because exercise is just too intimidating, accepting a failing grade because studying isn’t as fun as the 12 hour Stranger Things binge.

One of my favorite mantras I’ve ever heard is from the Marines, one of the most driven, motivated, and disciplined groups of humans. Let me preface this by saying it is an extreme example, but a fantastic one nonetheless.

“Everyone wants to get into heaven, but nobody wants to die.”

While this may seem extreme to some, its the truth. We all fear the process behind success, behind growth. We find nervousness, anxiety, fear in the simple thought of change. With self-discipline, these thoughts begin to fade. If we can somehow coach ourselves to never stop fighting for what it is that we are fighting for, no one can stop us. The words, actions, and thoughts of others mean nothing to the disciplined.